If your boyfriend has been away on deployment and you are now thinking of getting back together with ex boyfriend, it may have its difficulties but can be a worthwhile effort. This would have been a totally different experience for him and he will no more be the kind of person you remember him to be.
He will have matured a lot under the circumstances. He might even have had some traumatic experiences depending on where he has been to. Considering this, it may be best to start all over again and begin getting to know each other.
He will not be the only one who has changed. After the breakup with him and the time since then, you could also have changed. The changes may mean a better relationship and you have a good chance of getting back together with ex boyfriend. Or maybe not. It is not about “the way we were” but rather how things will be for the future.
It is no point rushing into things. Take it slowly and as if you have not known each other before. Go on dates and spend time talking with each other. Discover each other.
Also go and do some fun things. Go roller blading, bowling, hang gliding or whatever fun stuff that the two of you can enjoy together. He may find something that he really enjoys.
Share his good and bad experiences with him. Life is not all about a bed of roses. You need to share both a physical as well as an emotional attachment. After getting back together with ex boyfriend, both need a level of maturity to handle life’s challenges.
But even before getting back together with ex boyfriend, note that you are making a choice involving a military personnel. This can mean long separations with the possibility of him being posted on dangerous missions. You may have to live abroad in military housing.
By choosing him, you already know that these are possibilities. You need to accept these eventualities and don’t expect him to give up on his career later.
There also needs to be trust as he cannot share some things with you due to military rules. You need to be able to just accept this.
